The Diverse Mum’s Group – Farzana's Blog
Farzana Khatun talks about the Diverse Mum's Group in our Perinatal Service
What attracted you to this specific group?
The ‘Diverse Mum’s Group’ was amazing because I was able to share my worries with other mothers and it allowed me to cope with all of the overwhelming problems I was facing during this lockdown. This included life after giving birth, there were also other mothers who I could relate to on a cultural level. Something I appreciated with this group was the ability to talk about my religion openly.
What did you like about this group?
I loved how I made new friends who understood me and made me feel comfortable. These friends were people I could just be myself in front of, talk about anything I wanted to talk about and not feel judged by them. I felt welcomed and loved especially since they were really easy to talk to. I am grateful for them because I know that it takes courage to talk through problems. There are so many people out there who are going through what I am going through but are not able to speak to anyone because they feel as if nobody understands. This is mainly because it is a taboo topic in our culture.
How did the group make you feel?
I felt like we were all a little family and that my worries were heard and cared about. The sense of loneliness was gone. They helped me build up my confidence with their positivity.
How did it meet your cultural needs?
In the group, we spoke about everything we go through in our lives as we come from a different background such as how people mix culture with religion which leads to people disliking us for no reason. They question our religion even though it’s got nothing to do with it! Our family don’t take mental health seriously. They either think its an illness, you’re overreacting, being dramatic or that you have a jin in you. They don’t understand that we are not going crazy, it is something we are feeling. It was nice knowing that I am not the only one that’s experienced these things, they have also experienced it.
What’s different about this group, compared to other groups you have attended in the past?
The difference is that in this group we are all so alike, we can joke about, have laughed and no one will judge. There was no formality which I liked about this group.
Why do you feel it is important to have this group for other mums from different ethnic backgrounds?
It is important to have this group just for support and to keep us going, as we get to see others who are same as us, a safe place to talk openly.
What do you like about the friendship WhatsApp group which we created and why is this important to you?
Often, once you relieve your problems to someone the moment is forgotten about later on, with no further signs of improving the problem. With the WhatsApp group, I can feel secure about being open about my problems instead of feeling any regret.
What are the benefits you have achieved from this group?
Most importantly I have made amazing friends. I have found that this social connection keeps me connected to the real world, instead of getting lost into the chaos of worries in my head. We also gave each other tips to help us cope with these situations. Even shared recipes of the food we make and other things too.